Nurturing Mental Wellbeing in Students: A Personal Journey

As educators, we often find ourselves at the crossroads of nurturing young minds while silently grappling with our own mental health challenges. My journey with mental health has been a lifelong one, and only now, having spent years working on my own self development, am I beginning to truly see how it has shaped my life.

I've been fortunate, as I haven't had to face the crippling insecurities, overwhelming anxiety, depression, or other complications that can truly affect every aspect of a person's life when dealing with a clinically diagnosed illness. My mental health challenges haven’t been debilitating in the sense that they didn’t prevent me from leading a seemingly ‘normal’ life. It’s been more of an undercurrent, a persistent feeling of unworthiness that has influenced my decisions for over three decades.

Looking back, I can clearly see how my lack of self-worth shaped my life’s trajectory. Childhood experiences, such as being overweight, in primary school, deeply impacted my self-esteem. These early wounds, though common, have a way of festering and influencing our adult lives in ways we may not immediately recognise. In fact, I often wonder if anyone truly emerges from childhood unscathed, with a full sense of self-esteem and confidence.

Now don’t get me wrong, I have had a fabulous life, I’ve been to beautiful places around the world, I had loving parents who supported me in everything I did, I’m a mother to three beautiful children of my own, and have a job I love and am passionate about. But I’ve also come to realise how these early experiences permeated my entire life. From struggles with alcohol and cigarettes to exercise addiction and binge eating, each of these behaviours was rooted in the same core issue: a deep-seated sense of unworthiness.

Now, as a parent, I see some of these same struggles mirrored in my own children. Although the issues they face are different, the feelings of sadness, anxiety, and overwhelming emotions are all too familiar. This has been a challenging realisation for me. As someone who advocates for mental health awareness and wellbeing, it’s difficult to accept when my own children are struggling. It’s led me to question whether I’m practicing what I preach, or if the methods I advocate for even work.

I couldn’t help but go through a stage of analysing my parenting and wondering what I could, or should, have done differently. Wondering how my actions may have added to the pain my children were feeling. I know I am not the perfect parent and that there are definitely things I could have done differently, however I’ve had to make peace with myself and know that I did the best I could do at that time. Now I know a little better, I will do a little better…….hopefully.

After much reflection, I’ve come to the conclusion that if anything, these experiences have strengthened my resolve to advocate for our youth. I’ve seen firsthand the impacts of anxiety and depression on young minds, and I’ve felt the despair of a parent who just doesn’t know how to help. These experiences have been far harder than anything I’ve been through personally and give me the resolve to work even harder for our children’s rights.

I hold immense respect for mental health professionals and recognise that there’s no one-size-fits-all solution for youth mental health. Mental health challenges are real, serious, and often debilitating. They don’t simply vanish with time or good intentions.

However, I do believe that the majority of people perhaps don’t have a mental illness as such, but just need tools to deal with the overwhelming emotions that come with growing up. I believe there is a way to help our youth navigate the tough times that come with childhood and that we don’t have to wait until we hit rock bottom in our 30’s or 40’s in order to learn ways to navigate these tough times. We know these challenges are coming; they are a part of life. So why aren’t we equipping our students with the knowledge and skills to handle them as a fundamental part of their education?

I know that mental health is covered in the Health and PE curriculum but why isn’t it integrated into our curriculum as an essential component of learning? How is it that understanding numbers and letters takes precedence over developing a sense of self and fostering self-care? Could we commit to learning about self and the intricacies of being human as a fundamental right? Developing a strong sense of self, fostering self-care, nurturing positive relationships, and cultivating a deep sense of responsibility and awe for our planet and the future we choose to create—these are the lessons that truly define what it means to be human.

As our government debates mandatory time for reading, writing, and math, we must also advocate for what truly matters: the mental health and wellbeing of our children.

I'm not entirely "cured," and I still experience really low days from time to time. However, over the past few years, I've discovered the tools that work for me. I meditate and exercise daily, write in my journal, and make sure to spend regular time alone. I learned these practices out of necessity because my mental health depended on it. For over twenty years, I didn’t have these tools— I didn’t even know they existed or that they could help me build confidence and lead to a happier life. My hope is that we take the time to introduce these tools and many others to students while they are young, so that when they inevitably need them, they are already within reach.

I firmly believe that by teaching mental health and wellbeing as part of our core curriculum, we give our youth the tools they need to navigate life’s challenges successfully. As teachers, we have a unique opportunity to shape the future by prioritising mental health in our classrooms. Let’s stand together and advocate for the changes that will truly make a difference in the lives of our students.

I’d love to her your thought so please connect with me at beingeducationnz on facebook and/or instagram and let me know your thoughts.

Thanks for reading and have a fabulous week,

Natalie